Kick Starting 2020 just right!

Happy New Year Everyone. As we say bye to 2019 with grateful hearts, we also welcome 2020 with excitement, while being hopeful for the best for us and our loved ones. Permit me to use a football analogy to make my point for this post. No one starts having a game plan half way into a match, or 10 minutes to full time. One starts preparing and drawing up a plan before the Match day, strategizing and having a plan B just in case certain changes need to be made while the play is on. So then, how can we kick start the “game” of 2020 just right? How can we make goals for 2020 that will work in 2020?

As a mother, a woman and a parent, I am asking you what is your plan for 2020? I know we are all tired of having New Year Resolutions that do not even survive the month of January, but this is bigger. What is the plan for the family? What is the plan for you and your spouse? What is the plan for the kids? What is the plan for you as a human being in need of your own personal sense of fulfillment? What is the plan if any to be more involved on a community level? What is the plan for finances for 2020? What are your spiritual goals, if any? There needs to be a plan or a goal, things do not just happen.

Let me start with the easier goals. So say your kids for instance. If they are younger in age, then you may still be the one setting goals like, When do we transit to solid foods? When can I stop buying diapers and we start potty training? When can I stop breastfeeding? How do I stop breastfeeding? Believe me, that is also a question especially for first time moms. Every day I said I would stop breastfeeding my 1st born, I gave in to the cries and screams and kept feeding her. I finally stopped by leaving her at my sister’s place for the weekend and that was how we achieved our target. For the other kids, I think I was more “hardened”, and just made up my mind and stuck with it despite the tears.

For older kids, the target can be slightly modified like how do we get to be independent and start feeding ourselves with minimal or no assistance? How can we achieve dry nights and get rid of the mackintosh? How can we get our kids to go to school without water works being involved? How can we get our kids to be responsible for their toys and then their rooms, and starting to do chores, no matter how little? Kids indeed want to be part of everything and it gives them a sense of involvement in running the home too, and it is our job to figure it out, how and when.


Kids are more than good grades, so do you help your kids reach character goals. Fighting, Lying, Anger issues, being withdrawn, Understanding boundaries, stealing, Hearing and Obeying instructions, Gadget Dependence etc and many other issues that need to be addressed that can influence and shape character. So for instance, I had a child who was Chairman of Water Works Committee (Crying Department). We had to set it as a goal for a year as she identified it as an area she could improve. So we usually have the list in my family as Things I would Like to do; Things I would like to Stop Doing and Things I would like to improve. We do periodic assessment to know how close we are getting to our goals or to see how far we are drifting away from our goals. Are you thinking that this list of goals is already too much? Never mind. I have not even gotten to you yet! LOL!!

So what about you, how do we take care of you? Well, I do not know, because everyone is different and to be honest some of us do not even know what we want. We think we have an idea or know, but sometimes our abandoned projects midyear is more than that of the Federal Government, LOL. So it is important that you call a meeting with yourself and pinpoint what is really of premium value to you, God willing. Next, identify matters that are important and others that are of “just there” value. Know what you want to push yourself over for.

Also, we must remember that we are mothers in 2020 and not 1946. Work smart as a mother too. Use smart gadgets to make things easy for you. Use a washing machine, get good help if you can afford it and need it, use your phone more as a calendar, a reminder for events and as a note or memo pad to jot down things as you remember them in that meeting, the store or anywhere. My sister in law exposed me to how phones can help me be more productive, so instead of thinking that phones are my downfall, I can actually make it my ally.

You might also want to review your time with your spouse this year. Sometimes we get so caught up being parents and career professionals, we forget ourselves in all the commotion of life. We should aim to be more deliberate about the real things that matter. Let us be deliberate about maintaining intimacy with our spouses and I am guilty of this just as much as you, so do not worry, we will all repent together.

So many things to deliberate on and I have not even exhausted the list. Chai! I better stop for now and perhaps we will adjourn on another day before we overload ourselves mentally. But before I sign out, may I say thank you for always stopping by to read. Keep sharing with others as we learn and grow on this journey together. We will leave no one behind o as we make progress. Until then, enjoy the gift of a new year. The slate is blank. Be careful what you write on it. Love you!


photo credits: the internet


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