Hello Everyone. Apologies for the long break in transmission. That was me just trying to cope with summer and keeping the kids engaged, but I it is my pleasure to announce that I survived it, with minimal scarring (no pun intended) LOL!
Today I would like us to look at a very important aspect of motherhood, our delivery channel. You have been pregnant for 38 weeks plus, and it is time for delivery and we are told numerous stories that only “weak” women give birth through caesarean sections, so what do you do? Some of us have our kids through vaginal deliveries, while others go through the Caesarean Section (CS) route. We would all wish and pray to do the vaginal delivery journey but sometimes… delivery plans change.
I have heard of many women and know some myself, who would have been alive today if they had a CS delivery, but somehow they became victims of fear, or perhaps they thought they had something to prove by pushing out the baby. To twist a phrase used by pilots which I heard in the movie “The Bridge”, “Taking off is optional, landing is a necessity” or something like that, I would say to women in general “getting pregnant and going into the labour ward is optional, but coming out alive and with your baby alive too is also preferred”.
Years ago I was talking to a relative who delivered by CS and she said “I am sorry I did not push out the baby”. At first I was so shocked that she was even apologizing for it, and I had to respond “Who Cares? You are here and the baby too”. However, I know that instinct all too well now and recognized it in me during my last pregnancy. If you are reading this, you might say I am educated and cannot think like that, but you would be surprised if you found yourself in that scenario, deep down there is this preference to have it the natural way. Don’t get me wrong, I am not discountenancing matters of faith and belief which are important, but in some cases, even lives of babies have been altered as they become distressed and then have health challenges.
Apart from my last delivery I had my other kids through vaginal delivery. When my doctor saw that I was having twins during my ante-natal scan visits, his first response was “You are having a CS”. I kind of felt offended that he was not even asking me what I wanted to do and called him out on that, to which he replied that for multiple pregnancies he does not like taking chances, as babies seem to have a mind of their own especially during delivery time and that he was not ready to play a game of catch me if you can.
When I travelled abroad and met the doctor that would deliver, one of the questions he asked me was “what kind of delivery would you want to have?” I was shocked that I even had a say. So I was honest enough to tell him that I would like to do a vaginal delivery if I could, and he was okay with that based on the final scan he would do before my delivery. But as we kept going on with the scans and I kept seeing the jangolova acrobatics the boys where doing inside, and how they were changing positions especially the second twin, only me humble myself, and advised myself to do a CS. What I got was a bikini line scar, 2 healthy boys, and a shouting-free labour-free experience (I did 4 kids without pain killers, chai).
There is a difference between a planned CS and an unplanned CS but still things are ideally done the same way, I should think. I know some women who have been cut open without any anaesthesia because time was of the essence at the moment. Some doctors also unfortunately make vertical incisions and that makes some females to feel vulnerable when we look at our bodies. We may feel less attractive or scarred, no longer sexy to our spouses when we take off our clothes, but I would like to draw your attention to the bigger picture. You had your baby! You are alive! It is most likely your baby is still alive. That is all that matters!
It will take a bit more time for you to recover and get back into the bounce of things after delivery but by your 6 weeks checkup, if you are a “good patient”, you will be fine. I had to catch myself after I had my CS, I was trying to do things I could before, bending down to pick and wash things. On such an occasion, the sharp pain I felt called my brain back to order, and I remembered the doctor’s instructions that you have to give the internal scar as well as the external scar time to heal well. Omo I maintain quick quick, when I thought of what my twins would have to go through if I was readmitted back for torn stitches.
Also with a CS scar, one must be careful before doing exercises for the stomach area, but I do remember that I got a girdle from the hospital to use which helped to hold the stitches and the stomach in for everyday activities. Do not worry my sisters, after we are healed and recovered we can go on one of all these wonderful diet plans and recover your shape. There are wonderful gadgets (“waist kidnappers”) available that can help you suck in that gut to fit into that perfect dress for that occasion, but just be careful not to make it so tight so that you do not pass out (speaking from experience LOL).
You are not any less a woman because you had to give birth by caesarean section. Never forget that. Be grateful to God for your pregnancy and the gift of new life. Flaunt that body regardless. It is great warriors that live to show and tell of their battle scars. Abi no be so?